326: Identify the target of this amusing letter from late 2008.

“What is this? Why have I been given it? What have I done to deserve this? And, which one is the starter, which one is the desert? You don’t get to a position like yours Richard with anything less than a generous sprinkling of observational power so I KNOW you will have spotted the tomato next to the two yellow shafts of sponge on the left. Yes, it’s next to the sponge shaft without the green paste. That’s got to be the clue hasn’t it. No sane person would serve a desert with a tomato would they. Well answer me this Richard, what sort of animal would serve a desert with peas in?

I know it looks like a baaji but it’s in custard Richard, custard. It must be the pudding. Well you’ll be fascinated to hear that it wasn’t custard. It was a sour gel with a clear oil on top. It’s only redeeming feature was that it managed to be so alien to my palette that it took away the taste of the curry emanating from our miscellaneous central cuboid of beige matter. Perhaps the meal on the left might be the desert after all.

Anyway, this is all irrelevant at the moment. I was raised strictly but neatly by my parents and if they knew I had started desert before the main course, a sponge shaft would be the least of my worries. So lets peel back the tin-foil on the main dish and see what’s on offer.

I’ll try and explain how this felt. Imagine being a twelve year old boy Richard. Now imagine it’s Christmas morning and you’re sat their with your final present to open. It’s a big one, and you know what it is. It’s that Goodmans stereo you picked out the catalogue and wrote to Santa about.

Only you open the present and it’s not in there. It’s your hamster Richard. It’s your hamster in the box and it’s not breathing. That’s how I felt when I peeled back the foil and saw this.

Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking it’s more of that Baaji custard. I admit I thought the same too, but no. It’s mustard Richard. MUSTARD. More mustard than any man could consume in a month. On the left we have a piece of broccoli and some peppers in a brown glue-like oil and on the right the chef had prepared some mashed potato. The potato masher had obviously broken and so it was decided the next best thing would be to pass the potatoes through the digestive tract of a bird.

Once it was regurgitated it was clearly then blended and mixed with a bit of mustard. Everybody likes a bit of mustard Richard.”

325: The logo for the merged entity comprising of Air India and Indian Airlines – a flying swan with the Konark sun.

14 thoughts on “326

  1. Best customer complaint letter addressed to Richard Branson, on the food served on Virgin Airlines

  2. This is a complaint letter sent to Sir Richard Branson, which is currently being emailed globally and is considered by many to be the world’s funniest passenger complaint letter.

  3. Richard Branson, this is a letter from a dissatisified customer of virgin airways

  4. This was the letter written to Richard Branson reportedly by an Indian passenger of a Virgin flight, unhappy with the food served on board.

  5. Virgin airlines food (Letter addressed to Richard Branson)

    This was supposedly the world’s funniest complaint letter (By a certain Mr. Beale who did not appreciate the meal served on Virgin Airlines)

  6. This is a letter received by the Virgin Atlantic customer complaints team from a passenger aboard the Mumbai to Heathrow 7th December 2008.

  7. Richard Branson, Virgin Atlantic. Some guy wrote this letter to Branson criticizing the food on the flight.

  8. Complaint letter written by a passenger on Mumbai-Heathrow line of the Virgin Atlantic to Richard Branson to whom Branson supposedly called and thanked personally for the feedback

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